It's The Little Things

Birthday #37 Wrap-up

I've decided birthdays are really, really awesome when you are a kid and then steadily decrease in funness after the age of 18. I think parents do an amazing job of making you feel special by throwing parties, showering you with love and gifts, bringing cupcakes to your school and generally causing a major hoopla, all in honor of the day you were born.

After you leave home, people are not so keen to whoop it up. Meanwhile, your childhood memories get you ramped up for a day of total merriment, and when that doesn't happen, well, it's kind of a bummer. And at least for me, it's not an "I'm getting older, what a bummer" but rather a, "No one remembered or cares - bummer". That is part of the reason I personally take it upon myself to do the weeklong celebration... so I can make my birthday extra special and memorable.

Maybe I'm the only one that feels that way. But after talking to some friends, I know I'm not alone. That's why even the smallest gesture on one's day of birth is a very big deal to the birthday person. I think any woman would agree with me; when it comes down to it, it really is the thought that counts.

"The Rose"

(Not to be confused with the song of the same name, this rose is part of my birthday tale.)

Last Monday was my birthday and I had to work - kind of a double whammy. I think birthdays on Mondays should be illegal. As my hectic, unfun work day was coming to a close, I was frantically trying to finish an order when Dave casually walked into my office (a secure location with keypad entry). I looked at him and said, "How did you get in here?" and he replied simply, "I have my ways". He smiled and handed me a bud vase; I kid you not, I nearly started crying. It had been a crazy, busy day and everyone at work forgot it was my birthday. But my husband? He brings me flowers. And you know what? That simple gesture made my day.

The "I've Got Big Plans" Surprise

(My husband is not a woodworker. We have no tools, no shop, no aspirations to just build stuff. Well, at least not until recently.)

When we moved into the ward, Dave was assigned a hometeaching companion. His companion happens to be Darwin, my boss from the UW, one of the past bishopric counselors from Everett 5th ward days, and the guy that claims to be the reason that Dave & I are together. He's a funny guy and is always asking us for a woodworking project that he can do for us. Dave announced the new companionship to me and I chuckled. Dave likes his HT visits to be short & sweet; he delivers the message, finds out if they have any needs, and then leaves. Darwin is a great guy, but man, he is so talkative and friendly, I knew they would have marathon HT visits. And you know what? I was right.

Shortly after the announcement, Dave told me that he was going hometeaching. And then a few nights later, another hometeaching visit was needed. And another. Being the uber-supportive wife that I am, I waved goodbye with a smile each time.

Over the past month, I periodically asked him what we were doing for my birthday, to which he woudl respond, "I've got big plans". After that comment, I started noticing a slew of clues. Being the suspicious sort, I started putting the puzzle together:

1. Dave & I have been talking about getting an entry way bench for our house, but due to budget stuff, we would need to wait a while.
2. Marathon HT visits started happening.
3. Dave would ask to take the truck for the visits. Oddly, the seats would come back folded down.
4. Darwin came over one night after HT because he wanted to see our new house. He casually around and then seemed to focus on the space where we would put the new bench. We were about to go upstairs to see the rest of the house and he was like, "don't need to see it, gotta go!" And they both left for some more "home-teaching".

I went to lunch with Linda one day and told her my suspicions. The Friday prior to my birthday, he had to work late. I was super tired, worn out and getting increasingly frustrated with a busy toddler as the hours rolled by. When Dave finally got home, I was bathing Benjamin and nearly in tears. He walked into the bathroom and was smiling. I was not. He asked if I wanted to go see my surprise gift and I snapped, "No!" (such a nice wife, huh?!) and walked out of the bathroom. Well, he told me what it was and I then quickly retorted that I already knew, that I figured it out.

And just like that - POOF.

Talk about taking the wind out of someone's sails. I am so not proud of my behavior. The look on his face said volumes - it was like a dagger to my soul. I quickly tried to fix it by agreeing to go see it. We went to look at it and it was so wonderful. I apologized profusely for my childish antics, but the damage was done. I am a mean, mean birthday girl and don't deserve a darn thing.

But you guys - despite my less-than-lovely behavior - Dave was excited to show me his gift. I was pretty amazed because the bench is beautiful. He told me he has been spending the last several weeks designing and building it, but there is still much more to do. And although I don't deserve it after my little episode, this is the sweetest thing that Dave has ever done for me. Gosh, I love that guy - who loves me even at my worst.