The Incident: Michelle's Take

Now that Fast Sunday has rolled around again, we've hit the one-month anniversary of "The Incident"... so, I think it's time to share my side of the story. It's a doozy and loopy mess of confusion, so hold on.

If you look back on my February 6th post, I mentioned what a great day I had had. After a brunch birthday party with close friends, I spent the rest of the day doing stuff around the house and playing with Benjamin. It was a really good day... until dinner time.

Dave and his friend, Bret had taken off around 6am to go "play in the snow" and try out Dave's new snowshoes up on Snoqualmie Pass. They also took climbing gear, but Dave told me they were just going to scout out some future ice climbing routes. Besides, we had to skip our date night on Friday, so Dave promised he'd be home in time to do something with me on Saturday night. This meant they'd be home in the late afternoon, or at the very latest - dinner time.

When they didn't show up at 5, I got a little inpatient. 6pm, a little mad. 7pm, worried. And at 8pm, I got very worried. I had called his cell phone a couple of times, but the call went straight to voicemail and I didn't want to leave a message, acting like the crazy, angry housewife that's nagging him to get home, already. Around 8, I didn't care if I won the Nag of the Year award, and I actually left a message, something to the effect of "You're not home and I am SUPER worried. WHERE ARE YOU??!!" At 9pm, I was totally freaking out. I had not heard a word and it had been dark for a couple of hours at that point; Snoqualmie is only about 90 minutes away, so they were either eating a very late dinner and being very rude to their patient wives -OR - something bad-bad-bad had happened. I was praying that it would be the former, and I'd chew him out for being so late and being so rude for not calling. Shortly before 9, I started calling around to friends and family in 4th ward, where Bret & his family live. I needed to get a hold of his wife, Jessica, but didn't have their number. Calling her confirmed my worst fear - she had not heard from Bret and she was as worried as me.

At this point, horrible and completely awful scenarios starting dancing in my head. Plus, I didn't know how to report a missing husband - and all I knew was he was on Snoqualmie Pass and was NOT prepared for a night out in the cold, snowy mountains. Normally, Jessica & I know exactly where our adventure-seeking duo is going, what they're doing and when they will be back. In this sitution, we knew nothing and it was my worst nightmare playing out on that Saturday night. This was the Trifecta of Bad Scenarios, my friends.

As I was talking with Jessica, I started googling for answers. What a freakish, surreal thing to do; I can't recall with certainty, but do remember that I typed something like "1-800-Search&Rescue". Which, by the way, is not the way to get a hold of the wilderness rescuers. And while it may sound silly, I was a bit out of my mind - but I knew I needed to start the ball rolling. I deliberated calling my in-laws because I didn't want to freak them out. But, considering I was already in that state, I figured I could use the company. Plus, Dave's dad has had his fair share of wilderness experiences, so I was hoping that he could come up with something better than the 1-800 idea. I did find a website for Search & Rescue, but the office closes at 5pm. In the end, I dialed 911 - unfortunately, on purpose - and reported that my husband was missing. For the record, that phrase was one of the most sad and debilitating things I have ever had to utter.

What followed was like Mr. Toad's Wild Ride, on some serious speed. I honestly felt like I was having out of body experiences at times, but perhaps that is because I basically stopped functioning, except to answer my phone. I had the brunch food around 11am, and didn't eat anything the rest of that day. Not smart, but I was busy with a potentially life-altering crisis... so a sandwich didn't sound so good.

Upon urging from my mother-in-law, I made the 911 call around 9m. After being transferred a half dozen times, I ended up on the phone with a woman named Lisa from Emergency Response in King County. One of the most awful things was when Lisa asked where they were. I had no idea. I told her what I knew and she then gave me some investigative assignments. She asked me for the license or VIN number, neither of which I knew. I scoured through files until I found his vehicle registration, which had both items. Then she said to scour our home & work computer histories, to try to find links to potential search options. That yielded nothing, so I sent his parents over to the office to look at his computer. His Friday history had tons of links, which helped us narrow it down the Alpental Ski area and three different peaks. A short time later, his parents called back and found one link on Saturday morning - it was a place called Chair Peak. Dave said he had to stop by his parent's house to pick up some gear, so I was happy to see he swung by the office (minutes from their house) to make his final selection; that link was the key to finding his ultimate location.

At 9:30, two state patrol units were alerted and searching for his car (two different counties at Snoqualmie), ski patrols were dispatched to look for them, and Search & Rescue were on the case, as well. And they considered sending out some helicopters, but the weather was not cooperating. One good thing was that they found the Audi in the Alpental parking lot, so they knew they were in the right place, for sure.

At some point, my mother-in-law came over. She was a mess, I was a mess - and we both knew that neither of us would be sleeping much that night. Lisa, the Emergency line lady, called from her personal cell phone to tell me she was going home for the night. Then she asked if I was related to Ben Goodwin, to which I said yes and he was sitting right there, asking to speak to the Emergency folks. I handed him the phone, saying that the lady knew him. As a side note, everyone knows my father-in-law; seriously, everywhere we go, someone knows him! Anyway, they chatted for a couple of minutes. Apparently, she is in my in-laws ward and is the visiting teacher for Kathleen, my mother-in-law. Wild, huh?

Shortly thereafter, I called my parents because they were coming for dinner the next day; I didn't want to call and upset them, so I made it sound really nonchalant - which upset them that I sounded so calm about Dave being lost in the wilderness. My dad being my dad, he called every member of our immediate family, as well as all of my aunts & uncles, on both sides. I also had to call our bishop and let him know Dave wouldn't be at his meetings the next day - and then had to explain why, which sent me over the edge. The bishop contacted the stake president, which started a snowball communication - by morning, the entire stake knew about the situation and each ward was asked to fast for two men in our stake that were lost in the mountains. And all of my extended family was alerted, so the vast number of people fasting and praying for these guys was astounding.

Rewind to Saturday night. Kathleen & I sat in our living room; she was on the couch and I was in a lump on the floor. We didn't talk much, except when calls came in... and then we were just stifling the waterworks. From 9:30pm-2:30am, I received calls about every 10-15 minutes, usually from Search & Rescue for more details. When S&R asked what they were wearing, I almost starting laughing; how was I supposed to know when he left while I was still sleeping? But then, I remembered that I knew exactly what he'd be wearing because I know way too much about all of his gear. I do have to apologize to Bret; I made him taller, fatter and younger than I thought he was, and thought he was carrying his wife's red backpack. I also got calls from family and others that were concerned about the situation; I could barely talk, and usually had to hang up because I couldn't get anything verbal out except sobs. I was so lucky to get Benjamin down to sleep before the chaos started. If not, I think I would have totally lost it. I did check on him a couple of times, just so that I could clear my mind and pray.

At one point, S&R called and said they ran into two climbing groups, both of which had seen our guys climbing Chair Peak that day. In fact, one guy had climbed with them. This was awesome news and horrible news; awesome, because we had a better idea of their location, but horrible because they had decided to summit a mountain without preparing to do so.

Prayer was an amazing blessing and comfort - as was the Holy Ghost. As I laid on the floor and braced for the call that would deliver bad news, I said a continuous, pleading prayer. While I could have sunk into deep despair, a marquee-like message scrolled across my brain continually, reading: "It's Going to be OK." I didn't know if that meant Dave would be ok, or if Benjamin & I would be ok, but it gave me a certain sense of peace. At 2:30am, the man from Search & Rescue rang my phone, saying that they were calling off the search for the night but would resume at 7am. Kathleen & I later said it was devastating to hear that phrase, "calling off the search", but we understood the searchers would need to sleep.

I think Benjamin woke up around that time and Kathleen fed him, while I stared catatonically at nothing. I felt totally helpless and totally numb. I started to doubt the marquee message and let my mind wander to images of steep cliffs and snowy scenes. Benjamin went down to sleep and a couple hours later, I finally succumbed to the fatigue. Shortly before my wake-up call, I had a dream. I never dream, or at least, I never remember them. The dream was short, but it was an image of them walking out of the woods, safe and well. I woke up a short time later, hoping that that dream would be reality, but fearing that it was just a hopeful dream, and nothing else.

Jeff, the S&R guy, started the calls again that next morning. They asked more questions, advised me about weather issues and gave updates about any new info. Some of the searchers found tracks, but they were not snowshoe tracks - and I was adamant that they would have been using them. Chad, the 1st counselor in the bishopric, called and wanted to come over to talk about how to handle this in church. He wanted to do a ward fast, but I was hesitant because I knew Dave wouldn't want people to worry. Chad responded, "Dave's not here so we're doing it!" I figured the more people praying and fasting, the better - but I wanted to think about it a bit. We also got a call from S&R - the news media had been alerted of the situation and they wanted to know if we could disclose names. The family answer was "no way". Shortly after that, Linda came over with food. She is an angel straight from heaven - and she brought her delicious pumpkin mini muffins, which I will eat even if I'm not hungry. I didn't realize how hungry I was by then - I think I ate about 15.

At that point, my parents, Kathleen, Aubri (my brother-in-law, Jon's girlfriend), Benjamin and I were all huddled in our living room, waiting for the next call. Jon & my father-in-law decided to drive up to Snoqualmie. In case they found him, one of them could drive the Audi back down the mountain. While someone was playing with Benjamin, I fell asleep for a little while... until the next phone call.

The timing of events after this point is a bit sketchy, but just bare with me. Our church started at 12:30pm and Chad asked me to text him, letting him know about my decision. I sent him a text shortly before the meeting, giving him the thumbs up. Around 1pm, Jessica called me (we'd been talking pretty frequently all night, as I was the contact with S&R); she said she got a call from Bret that was short and cryptic; he said, "We're out" - but then the phone cut out. Everyone got excited, but we were all still a bit wary because we didn't know what that meant exactly... or where they were. Called S&R to update them, and they contacted Verizon to see if they could ping the phone. ~15 later, Dave called me. He said, "Get Benjamin ready, pack him in the car and get up to the Denny Creek trailhead." I almost started laughing & crying because there were so many people up there already; S&R, ski patrol and his family. I quickly sent Chad a text that they were ok, which apparently caused a huge, collective sigh of relief as he announced it over the pulpit in sacrament meeting. It took a bit of time to figure out where they were (they were up at Lake Melakwa when they called, not at the trailhead), but S&R finally found them as they were 20 minutes away from the parking lot.

Calls were made to all of the family and friends; my dad called his bishop, who ran around to all of the classrooms to herald the good news. Apparently, you could literally hear cheering throughout their whole building. But then, we just had to sit and wait. After that call from Dave, we didn't hear anything again until 3pm. That was just agonizing. We didn't know their condition, but after S&R got them to the cars and hauled them back up to Alpental, they had to be checked out by doctors and then did an interview with Komo4 news. Apparently, there were 4 different new station trucks up there, complete with the fancy satellite dishes - but Komo got to break the story, and the others just filmed from their vantage point.

At 5pm, they were home. Jessica and her girls came to pick up Bret and I met Dave in the parking lot. He looked dirty, unshaven, tired and had a cut on his chin from a falling ice tool. Still, I have never been more happier to see him.... never. After watching the news and eating a huge meal of KFC, the family sat and chatted. As we were changing to go to the ER to get him sewn up, Mark and Linda brought steaks, peas, salad and some other wonderful food. After such a crazy, intense 24-hours, we both needed a good piece of meat. Thank goodness for wonderful family, friends and total strangers that supported us during a terribly scary, traumatic experience.

As we were driving to the hospital, Dave & I talked a lot. From this experience, I learned some powerful lessons and he learned some powerful lessons, lessons that are private and sacred to us. But there is one little thing I will share with you. Remember that link that they found on his computer, which was our saving grace for finding him? I said it was so fortunate he went in to the office that morning, and looked at that site; it was the key to finding him. He looked at me intently and said, "I never went to the office that day." Neither of us knows how it got there and by the time he checked on Monday, it was filed under Last Week. However that little piece of information got on to his computer's memory, we will never know. I chalk it up as a tender mercy, a great blessing and a mighty miracle for our family.

I'm so grateful that prayers were answered and he got home safely - and for all of the support, blessings and love that were showered on us a month ago. And yes, for those wondering, he gets to go out again; he just has to tell me where he's going next time!